Personal

It's nothing personal.

I understand that. And while it's difficult not to be offended I know that it's true. It's nothing personal.

And that, I've discovered is my issue with the city. Nothing is personal. And I'm just as guilty. We all have our focus, our aims, our goals. Hard to do and see everything. Hard to connect beyond the surface- without a "what can this person do for me" or "what's in it for me" thought slipping through the head.

I book two shows. One after the other. Two months straight. Free performances. No excuses. Invite my friends, but I don't push it. Beyond a quick facebook invite and subtle reference to the shows in conversation. Hoping that people might take initiative on their own. Knowing really it's just as much my fault for not selling it. Feeling, already, like people have better things to do than see me in a small part in a small show nowhere near Broadway. As I believe it- so it is and my story proves true.

I know it's nothing personal

But for once- I wish it was.

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Editor's note: I don't write this a guilt trip. Or a pity party. Just as expression of feeling and observation of the city life. I am incredibly grateful for those few who did make it out to see a performance and do not by any means wish to disregard or demean how much it meant to me for them to come. Thank you!